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Writer's pictureJoy Manson

An Omnibus Post

This is a collection of little “thought-lets” and observations I made that don’t quite merit a post of their own.


Risky Business

I’ve been having some fun rolling over the snow- and ice-covered sidewalk around the backyard. I adore being outside in the cold, fresh air by myself. I’ve come to realize it’s the riskiest thing I do these days, other than shopping at Walmart. When it’s too slushy, I get bogged down and can’t move in any direction. If only they made snow tires or chains for wheelchairs. The first time I got stuck I figured it wouldn’t be long before a smoker came out for a puff and rescued me. And then I got mad. Surely I could find a way out of this myself. If I were driving a car I would straighten my wheels. I looked down at my front tires and they were both sideways. I fiddled with my joystick a bit until they were straight. If I were driving a standard, I would switch to a lower gear for better traction. So I beep-beep-beeped away on my little computerized control panel and slowed myself down from second into first. Just like the little engine that could, my ride chugged us out of there. Since then I’ve discovered how to spin myself out and drift a little bit. Last weekend I got stuck for real. About five minutes went by before a worker in the dining room spotted me and came out. This time one of my front wheels wasn’t even on the ground. She put all her gym time to good use and shifted my ride back and forth until the wheel made contact again.


Adventures in Dentistry

I just returned from my third dental appointment in as many months. I think the warranty on my teeth must have expired, because they’re all chipping and breaking off at the same time. I used to have bad dreams about opening my mouth to speak and shards of my teeth come tumbling out instead of words. Now it’s almost happening for real. It’s diet-related according to my dentist. No more walnut and pecan halves in my oatmeal, I guess. However, the prospect of chewing on both sides of my mouth, for the first time since December, thrills me.


My chinny chin-chin

I spent most of the winter watching the hair on my head get lanky and grey. I made the mistake of looking into my hand mirror a couple of days ago for the first in months. Two hairs huddled together towards the bottom of my chin in the centre. On the left side of my mouth, in the corner above my lip, lay three or four more coarse hairs. I wasn’t surprised to see them, because they’ve been with me for several years now, but I was shocked by their length. I recruited a member of the shower team to tweeze away my walrus-worthy moustache and tidy up my chin. It feels like I only just finished having to deal with adult acne, and now I have another source of facial angst. Will it ever end?


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