Been feeling kinda sad the last couple days. Nothing specific, just generally sad. Not really sure why, but I guess with my life and what I have to deal with it’s probably not so surprising. Here’s what’s been happening over the last week. Maybe reviewing it will tell me why.
Photo by Craig Tidball on Unsplash.
I met with the psychologist I see at the rehab Centre. It wasn’t as grueling as it has been sometimes. I’m in a different phase now where a lot of my personal problems have been put to bed, sort of, and now I’m turning over a new leaf by reaching out to people to tell them what I’ve gone through.
Today I had an appointment with my family doc. It wasn’t particularly helpful, which doesn’t surprise me actually. I’ve been finding more and more often that there’s not much they can do for me anymore. I have a thing growing on my face – a cutaneous horn, actually – and when I saw him three months ago he said he’d refer me to a plastic surgeon. When I asked him about it today it turns out he’d forgotten all about it. Said he would remember this time. Yeh right. We talked about UTIs and my various bladder issues. Blah blah blah. He heard me but I don’t think he listened. I decided not to push it. I made another appointment for three months time.
I’ve also been catching up with an old friend, someone I knew intensely for three years and long distance since then. Recently, I sent a detailed email about my life now. Three whole weeks went by without a reply, which was unusual. I got impatient and forced the issue. I emailed a reminder in case the first had gone astray, and then reached out on LinkedIn as well. It had crossed my mind that the reason he hadn’t replied yet was because he didn’t know what to say. And that’s why indeed. He didn’t want his words to sound meaningless and empty. They didn’t. Sometimes it’s just good to hear from an old friend.
I guess the three things combined into one big downer. It’s nothing I haven’t dealt with before, I guess, it’s just kind of discouraging to be dealing with it yet again. Or dealing with it still. Same sh*t, different day.
God I hate February.
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